To say that December has been a bit of a mess would be a massive understatement. I thought the worst problem I was gonna face would be the holiday shopping, which is a struggle I’ve had practically every year, but I was able to do that in the first week of December and it went pretty well. But no… it had to be something much worse, something that’s made me nearly useless.

You see, I wanted to go to the mall last Saturday, and I wanted to get something to drink, so I went ahead and got myself a bottle of juice, as I often do. After which, I took the bus and everything seemed fine at first, but right as the bus was leaving the terminal, I try to open the bottle, and bam, it suddenly split in half, my pants got soaked in juice, and there was a very nasty cut, which was immediately dripping with blood. At first I thought it wasn’t so bad, but since the blood kept on flowing, I was forced to return back home. I feel bad for whoever had the misfortune of cleaning that mess.

And so, I got off the bus and threw away what was left of the bottle, and then walked to another street where I could take another bus to go back home. I had to try and cover myself as best I could while drawing as little attention as possible. I was forced to use my left hand for practically everything, which of course makes me twice as clumsy. And so, I sat in a corner where I wouldn’t be noticed. I was starting to feel a bit woozy with the blood I was losing, and to make matters worse, there was a rapper that got on the bus and it was one of those that interacted with people, or in other words, the most annoying ones. Thankfully he didn’t see me, and as painful as the trip was, I did make it home rather quickly.

As soon as I made it home, I immediately ran towards the bathroom to clean my injury and assess how bad it truly was. It was really pale, and getting it cleaned up was just painful, the blood kept coming out and it was even getting clumped up from how long it had been sitting there. So, my mom, somewhat scared, told me to get it checked out at the local medical center. Normally I hate going there because they’re very slow, and I don’t really trust our public healthcare system, but I didn’t have much of a choice. So my mom’s ex drove me there and I went to the receptionist, where I told her my problem, and amazingly, I was taken inside right away. They then asked me a bit of personal info, what happened exactly, and they checked my injury, cleaned it and left me there for a while, while a kid in the background was throwing up… great. Then a doctor asked me the same things, and proceeded to stitch up the injury… which hurt like hell at first because he had to inject a numbing agent. But then it was done, though it kept bleeding for a bit longer. I was given some meds and then I went back home with my mom.

This last week with the injury has been a bit annoying, as you might expect. I got checked again on Monday, and the injury, while slightly swollen, wasn’t looking too bad. It got cleaned up and new bandages were applied. I also had to work and do other things while my hand was healing. Work hasn’t been too bad at least, it’s been very slow but my hand is functional enough to be able to use the mouse. But it seems like I must’ve done a bit too much movement with it, because when I got checked again yesterday, it was still a bit swollen, and I was told that if it didn’t heal, something more drastic would have to be done. What that would be, I’m not so sure, but it’s certainly scary. I felt like the nurse wasn’t very professional either, saying there was fresh blood (there wasn’t, it was actually dry) and even making a self-harm joke… classy. So I’m supposed to get checked out again on Tuesday, I’m not exactly hopeful and I am rather worried, because who knows what’s gonna happen to my hand. On top of that, they told me to take the pills for three days, but they gave me enough for a whole week, I don’t know what’s up with that.

And my mom is telling me to handle things like an adult, whatever the hell that means. I guess now that I’m 24, I can’t be worried or sad about this. It amazes me that despite the medical issues I’ve had in the past, she doesn’t want to take me seriously when it comes to these things. And I’ve given up on explaining these things to her because I know damn well she’s not gonna listen, it’s a lost cause honestly. She thinks only she is right and everyone else is wrong. It pisses me off how little empathy she’s showing for me, and I know she’d be upset if I did the same thing with her, too. I get that I can be a bit dramatic, but still, treating things like this with indifference- and especially towards your son, regardless of age, is plain wrong. No wonder I never go to her whenever something happens to me now, I know she’s not gonna help or even try to understand me.

On another note, I got a new lamp. I was in need of one, so I figured why not. It looks super cool, I gotta say. Yes, this was actually why I wanted to go out last week… ah well.

Anyway, that’s my life update. I’ll be sure to let you all know how the stitch removal goes. If you’re on Bluesky, you can find me there too for quicker updates. See you all in the next post.

UPDATE (December 17th): I got checked. The injury is healing rather slowly because of the area it happed in. But it is improving, at least it’s not overly swollen like it was last Friday. I will keep the stitches for a bit longer until it gets better, so if the healing process goes well, they should get removed on Friday.